It’s a vicious cycle. One moment we’re best friends and being goofy with each other. The next, we hate each other. Or at least I think
we do. It’s the most toxic form of love. We’ve seen through each other’s souls. Through all the dog poo…and it’s too much to bare. The
messed up part is that we share a child together. We are not together though. Never were…officially. His words, not mine. I have a
boyfriend now. I love him, but it’s different. I don’t shatter with him. We break up, but I don’t fall apart. I still get mini panic attacks over baby daddy’s status updates. I don’t even know why I catch feelings over those when we barely even say Hi to each other these
days. Damn, these are my honest thoughts revealed. Thoughts I have been doing so well at concealing…well at least I thought.

My baby is sleeping on my chest as I write this. I wonder if she can feel these heart palpitations. It’s 05:03 AM. I haven’t been able to go
back to sleep since 01:50 AM. All that I’m writing now is a result of all this time spent reminiscing. ‘Apologize and go back to sleep.’
Yes, I’ll do just that.