Dear Mama,

How do I even begin to express my gratitude for the kind of sacrifices you make? For your life?

You wake up in the early hours of the morning preparing everything for us – heating up our bath water, ironing our school clothes, preparing breakfast. You sacrifice your precious hands so we can have clean clothes. Even when we tore our pants and dresses from playing in the sun, you graciously sewed them together. You work hard everyday so we can have a warm meal every evening. Whenever we experience pain – from falling, failing, heartbreak – you are there to comfort us. You wipe the tears away and assure us that everything will be okay. I wonder if you get hurt. Do you cry too? Do you also receive the same comfort your offer so calmly?

You were just a teenager when you had me. So you were forced to leave your childhood prematurely and quickly assume the role of a mother. It couldn’t have been easy standing by the sidelines watching your peers doing what other teens do. What you should’ve been doing. You traded your matric farewell dance and freshers ball for poopy nappies and sleepless nights. The money you could’ve used to buy your favourite pair of jeans and sneakers ended up buying baby formula and gripe water. I am a warm, clean, and well fed child, that surely must mean you are doing an awesome job taking care of me and that is worthy of praise.

You sacrificed your dreams so we could reach ours. Now dad says he doesn’t want to be in our lives anymore and you’re forced to assume the role of mommy and daddy for us. It must be hard now having to use the same salary to perform double the tasks. You’re wondering if it wouldn’t be much easier if you just sold your car and have us move to a much cheaper, smaller apartment. Private school is not cheap either – we may not understand why we have to go to public school now but we trust you when you say it will all work out. We have trusted you from the day we were born, it won’t hurt to trust you now because we know just how much you love us. You are all too cautious about who you bring into our lives because you don’t want us to get hurt all over again. You quit trying to find
love altogether because you are tired of being judged. Heal Mama. You can still pick up the pieces and build them into something new. Something beautiful. You deserve to love and be loved.

You didn’t have your own mom and dad around to raise you. You’re wondering how you’re going to raise me? But who said being raised by your grandparents makes you different from everyone else? They provided a roof over your head, clothed and fed you, they took you to school and even shared with you some of the best principles and lessons life has to offer. Are those not enough for you to apply in my life? If only you would quit comparing yourself to your friends and neighbors you would see just how well you’re doing.

You think you’re less of a mom because your birthing experience was different. You had a c-section, so what? Am I not beautiful in your eyes? Yes, I was born prematurely but I’m still a child. Your child. Your blessing from God. So what if you have scars? Why do you worry so much about my uniqueness from all the other children? I can’t even begin to imagine just how hard it must be trying to silence the noises in your head that are judging you for how I was conceived. You do it because you love me. I hope you know just how much I love you too.

If only you would quit punishing yourself for leaving us with grandpa and grandma so you could go back to school. To work. It’s the sacrifice you have to make so we can have some of the best things in life. You quit your job that you love so dearly so you could spend more time with me. Don’t ever regret making this decision, it was the best for you at the time given the circumstances. There is no manual to being the best mom. You just have to take what you’ve been given and find ways to make it work.

You think because you came into our lives as daddy’s girlfriend doesn’t qualify you as a mother? My mother? Well, you’re wrong. You helped me with my homework. Picked me up from school. Taught me how to swim and ride a bike. We bake and prepare Sunday-kos together. We play together. Yes, I have my own mommy but by virtue of sharing your life with us, you have become my mommy too and I love you.

Keep on being the awesome mother that you are. There’s only one version of you and we are super grateful to you for sharing your life with us. For your sacrifices. We love you. Thank you and happy Mother’s Day!

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